Bystander perspective

It’s similar to my previous post on “rational and emotional”, but this time I want to mainly self-reflect on the bystander perspective I take in certain circumstances.

I hate the fact that “Bad money drives out good” is happening all the time, in different scenarios. (I might have complained about this for several times) For example, the worst thing about NUS in my opinion is that the shuttle bus: during peak hours, I might not be able to get on the bus because there are so many people trying to get on, without any regulation. As a reference, Singaporeans are generally very disciplined when it comes to queuing, and very rarely do people attempt to get on from the back door. However, more than half NUSers try to get on from the back door of the shuttle bus, leading to chaos and unfairness. Ah, I’m not here to claim that “I am good money”, but possibly because of my personality and bodyshape, I feel like it’s unfair to those who are weaker than me if I also try to be pushy to get on the bus.

Does anyone care? In case everyone has to be “bad money” to survive in this world, it might be my fault for even blaming others for being “bad money”. However, the fact is, my bystander perspective cares.

Competition in real life is ruthless, but not to the level that everyone has to be “bad money”. Of course, people should realise that the advantages from being “bad money” come with the cost of someone else’s disadvantage. If you are not yourself, you are very likely to not behave as “bad money” (because obviously it’s fair, in the sense of global optimum).

So the issue is here: people fail to have the bystander perspective for avoiding being “bad money”. Their subjective view on the situation is that “if I don’t do it, others will do it, and I will be disadvantaged”, so the “bad money” behaviour seems to be a “privilege”. Such privilege sucks, but many people don’t even realise that “if you are enjoying the privilege, you are not qualified to complain about others’ privilege when it hurts you”.

Similarly, when PRC citizens (not using “Chinese” intentionally since the article’s context is relevant to Singapore) complain about the life cost in developed countries, or being proud of the low cost of living in PRC, I often feel pretty regretful. Don’t they really fail to find the difference? The low cost of living in PRC comes with the cheap labour of people. You get 5 pieces of corn for 1 dollar, with the side effect that a family of farmers earns 300 dollars for the whole year (not even considering the risk of crop failure). As a bystander, I would like to pay 3 times the price for corn, since it’s only about saving a little less money for me, but improving the life quality of farmers significantly. (Here the story can be extended forever, like “oh, you know, it’s the market economy”; then it’s about communism vs capitalism debate.. Currently it’s neither fish nor fowl IMO).

Privilege is not the only scenario where bystander perspective is important. You can be reasonable, objective, and calm in many situations when you jump out of “Player (you)” mode. It’s not about ignoring your personal feelings, but more about understanding the overall situation better.